One of the things I know I'll always remember from this part of my life is the summer nights on my bike, at dusk, chasing the moon. I look up at the stars and close my eyes and tilt my head back and it's like heaven rolling over my face and into my hair. . putting some light back into my eyes. The stars and the sky are some of the only things that help me through the chaos, because I know they're there, and I know they're real. They're pure, raw, and beautiful, and they're solid things, but they're alive. I was born under this sky and that's where I'm gonna be buried. . gonna find love, maybe have kids. I'm gonna leave my sunny days and blue skies behind when I go.
And i could tell the sky all my secrets. All the chains I could throw into the night air, and they're gone. I could throw away all the facades when I'm under the open sky.
Things are still twisted, but some things are lookin up. I'm starting to get more opportunities, but also more obstacles. I'm still going to keep pretending. . I'm so close to not pretending ever again. I have to stay strong and remember who I am. I know I'll be safe, and when it's all said and done, I want to be a good person. I want to not be scared. Know that Im free. Fit in and have closer friends. Even the sky has clouds. But I know that I'll be okay. I have a good heart and I know how to have real fun and let myself go.
Just wanna say - to any of you who have been following this blog, thank you, and god bless for staying by my side even though my life (and blog) are a mess sometimes.
have a good weekend
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